CHILD NOT WANTING TO ATTEND SCHOOL?
Look closely.
It could be a sign of SCHOOL REFUSAL BEHAVIOR
As Diwali vacations ended, Veer’s school refusal began. At the school’s reception, he was seen clinging to his father who was helplessly struggling with the child’s unwillingness to attend school. It was the second working day after the vacations and the child was trembling with fear. The father shared that the child complained of severe headache and nausea the previous day and when he was allowed to skip school and stay at home, he became all well. Today, again at the time of going to the school, the complaints of headache returned.
What is school refusal behavior?
It refers to the extreme unwillingness of the child to go to school or stay in school. It is marked by severe distress and fear of attending the school. The child is often seen trying desperately to convince the parents to not to send him to school. The thought of attending the school is so scary for the child that he adopts desperate measures (sometimes leading to misbehavior) to avoid school.
It is a form of anxiety and can extremely challenging for the child, the child’s family and school personnel.
It is easy to confuse school refusal with truancy but the two are very different.
| School Refusal | Truancy |
| The child doesn’t wish to attend school because it causes severe emotional distress. | The child wishes to skip school in order to be able to do something else. |
| The child desperately tries to convince parents to allow him to stay at home. | The child often conceals from parents about his absence at school and is not home during school hours. |
Characteristics of school refusal behavior
Waking up and coming in terms with the reality of having to attend school leads Veer to become extremely fearful and panicky every morning. His distress is so severe that he actually experiences severe headache and disabling nausea. The next hour is spent in Veer trying desperately to convince his parents to let him stay at home. Since, the child’s fear is inexplicable, he finds it challenging to express why he wishes to skip school. He only cries and begs his parents to let him stay at home for one more day.
What are the possible reasons?
There could be a lot of reasons why a child starts refusing school. It is crucial to provide support and understanding to the child instead of blaming him. Often, parents tend to think that the child is building excuses to skip school and therefore is faking the symptoms of headache, nausea, and pain. However, it is extremely important to understand that the child IS ACTUALLY EXPERIENCING THE PAIN because these symptoms are physical manifestation of his severe anxiety.
The child refuse school to be able to avoid aspects of school (e.g. teachers, peers, classroom etc.) that arouse negative affectivity or distress in the child.
Another reason could be to escape from evaluative social situations (presentations, performances, interaction with peers).
Separation anxiety often leads to school refusal. Research shows that about 75% of children with separation anxiety show school refusal behaviour. Moreover, the attention that the child receives from parents as a result of being home further motivates the school refusal behaviour of the child.
Additional benefits like sleeping late, watching T.V. or being with friends also serve as strong reinforcers.
Helping children showing school refusal
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